Horny Awning

May 13th, 2006 at 1:26 pm by james

It appears our weather order may have gone astray and it might storm this afternoon. Michelle, at the crack of sparrow-fart (as the saying goes) headed into town to get last-minute party bits and added a tarp to the list. We’ve never tried covering our pergola, but we’re not going to survive the party today without access to the deck, so covered it will be.

I was duly lashing tarp to pergola, with the girls playing quietly on the deck below me, when I realised Michelle was looking at me oddly. At first I thought she might be looking at me that way, but it was 11.30 on a Saturday morning and we have two young kids so I blinked and looked again. And then I heard it. Our neighbour’s current girlfriend is evidently rather vocal and, being summer, it’s far too warm to – ummm – sleep with the windows open. They were going at it hammer and tongs. Oh.my.goodness. Or at least she was, he’s apparently a little more reserved. If I’d been left any capacity for rational thought I would have recorded it on my phone and posted it here for you to marvel at.

Michelle had to rush inside lest her shrieks of laughter be heard by our good neighbour. I kept working on the tarp. The neighbour on the other side was working in her garden too and we spent a delightful fifteen minutes studiously avoiding eye contact and wearing facial expressions that related more to the task in hand than our humping neighbours.

They finished about the same time as I finished tying the tarp up. “You can come outside again, love, she’s come!

I couldn’t resist … neighbourly relations could be strained. Perhaps he was watching porn on his new plasma wall.

Party time in an hour …

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